The Trap of Comparing Ourselves to Others

Be honest. Who among us doesn’t wish we had his or her job | body | car | relationship | house | money | talent … the list just goes on and on?

It’s only natural for us to compare ourselves to others. Those who are perfectionists and high achievers constantly push themselves to perform at the highest levels are even more likely to fall prey to this incessant personal “benchmarking.” After all, we are hard-wired to consistently evaluate our progress and measure our success – and we naturally may gauge that performance by comparing ourselves to other people.

I, for one, am guilty of occasionally thinking longingly about how great those with a more “traditional” job have it. They get a predictable paycheck. They don’t have to worry about where their next project will come from. Then I sit back and realize just how the green the grass is on my side. I have priceless flexibility, rewarding relationships, engaging variety, and limitless opportunity. I was made to be an entrepreneur. I would not be content or fulfilled with the day-in, day-out 8-5, M-F – even if it does come with a pretty sweet (perceived) stability.

We cannot get so caught up measuring our lives and ourselves to others that we lose sight of our goals, and actually veer off track. From a practical standpoint, you are also needlessly using energy that could be utilized in areas where you excel or areas that you are passionate about.

Every ounce of energy that I waste wishing I were someone else is one that I can never invest in being a better ME.

Even worse, usually what we can see in other people is the “edited version” that they display to the world. Were we to gain a behind the curtain glimpse, their reality would probably look a lot more like our own “rough draft” than we might think.

Don’t compare what you see as the “outtakes” that is your life to others’ perceived “highlight reel”.

When you are so absorbed and so watchful of what OTHERS are doing, you’re not really living your life – or at least an authentic life.

Look inward.

What is that you do really well? What activity engages and inspires you? After all, it IS your life to live. Invest your time and energies in yourself.

Go forward. Know yourself. Be secure in your strengths and likes. The more self-assured you are, the less likely you’ll be to succumb to the outside pressures that will get you nowhere as fast as your own self-confidence and hard work can get you to your desired destination.

 

 

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