Last Friday, I told you about elephants—how as babies they’re tethered by a thick rope to a stake in captivity. They eventually learn not to try to get away, so the trainer replaces the thick rope with a thin one. Guess what? The grown elephant that could easily snap the thin rope like a twig doesn’t even TRY to get away. He’s (wrongly) accepted that he can’t escape.

I likened the elephant to us—as leaders—and how we must resist the temptation, at some point in our lives, to accept false limits for ourselves. These false limits prevent us from best using our talents and capabilities and fulfilling our potential.

Early in my career, a wise leader once told me he would rather embrace the pain of discipline than live with the pain of regret.

What does he mean by that?

Think about discipline. It can be very tough. Even painful. We have to take on the tasks, consistently and in some cases unrelentingly, that others are unwilling to do. But what was harder for this mentor of mine to stomach was the fact that he could have gone the other way—he could have accepted false limits imposed upon himself.

He could have “settled” for the comfortable or status quo.

The result: He would have to sit back and watch others take on opportunities which should have been his. He would experience the pain of being passed over for projects or positions. He would see others achieve the things that he had once been poised to achieve, before he was tethered to these false limits.

I still have a vivid memory of a conversation that took place in 2005 over lunch with a colleague, talking about our aspirations for the next 10, 20 years. I articulated my goal to be a well-respected speaker and content expert among healthcare leaders. I told the colleague on the other side of the table about my fears: That at the age of 45 or 50, I would be sitting in the audience at a gathering—watching someone else delivering a presentation, engaging attendees. I would experience regret. I would become keenly, painfully aware that this was the role I desired—the role I deserved and had once worked toward.

I, like my mentor, felt this situation would be intolerable and unacceptable.

Six years later, I am on my way toward that goal. I am exercising the discipline (albeit sometimes overwhelming and intimidating) to develop myself into a well-recognized thought leader and lecturer. I know it will take some time (remember: I’m on a 10-year, 20-year timeline?!) to get there, but I’m making the steps required to reach that destination. 

I’ll get there with discipline, as I have no room or tolerance for regret—and neither should you. Don’t tether yourself to the false limits that will result in your living with regret.

What is your goal? Are you willing to endure the pain of discipline to accomplish sweet victory?