Accepting false limits

I once read a story about elephants. When they are still babies, elephants are tethered by a very thick rope to a stake firmly hammered into the ground.  The elephant tries several times to get free but it lacks the strength to do so.

After some time, the animal gives up trying, believing that it cannot be free. At this point, the trainer changes that thick rope to a thin one, but the elephant makes no attempt to run away. Even when the elephant reaches adulthood, it continues to be tethered by a thin rope, reconciled to its captivity.

Clearly capable of escaping to freedom, the elephant simply stops trying.

As a leader I think we often accept false limits on what we believe we can accomplish.

I know I do.

Here are four common tethers that stop us from reaching our potential:

  1. Fear of failure. Fear of failure is something that we learn very early in life. Failure hurts (toddler learning to walk). Failure is embarrassing (I’ve written about this here). Failure is crippling (I’ve written about this here). But nothing worth having in life comes easy. Sometimes you have to fail forward until you experience the one effort that results in success.
  2. What will people think? Self-consciousness is a massive obstacle to most, including myself. In the end, we invest more energy insulating ourselves in obscurity, than we would have in taking the action we most desired. The only difference is that in the meantime, someone else has accomplished what you had hoped to. And now, you’re watching from the sidelines.
  3. Safety in numbers. The desire to belong is a powerful one. But, it most often leads to “group think” and mediocrity. Think of the bell-curve. 80 percent of any population resides in the “bulge”, aspiring to success, but afraid to take the leap. The standard deviation to the right walks a thin, oft treacherous, path.  But until you’re willing to test the tether and break away from the pack, you will continue to get the same results as everyone else.
  4. I’m not old | experienced | credentialed | permissioned, etc. enough. Yada, yada, yada. There are dozens of rationalizations that we can come up with to avoid being bold, and taking action. This is perpetuated by a “permission society” that relishes the concept of needing someone else’s blessing in order to do something. Anything. Don’t wait for someone else to tell you it’s okay. And stop making excuses. Just do it!

 

What about you? What false limits are you accepting that hold you back from the success you desire?